Women cancer carers have consistently been found to report higher levels of distress than men carers. However, there is little understanding of the mechanisms underlying these gender differences in distress, and a neglect of rewarding aspects of care. We conducted in-depth semistructured interviews with 53 informal cancer carers, 34 women and 19 men, to examine difficult and rewarding aspects of cancer care. Thematic analysis was used to analyze the transcripts. Women were more likely to report negative changes in the relationship with the person with cancer; neglect of self, social isolation, and physical health consequences; anxiety; personal strength and growth; and to position caring as a privilege. Men were more likely to report increased relational closeness with the person with cancer, and the burden of additional responsibilities within the home as a difficult aspect of caring. We interpret these findings in relation to a social constructionist analysis of gender roles.