Older people with dementia living in the community are most likely to be cared for by other older people, predominantly spouses, who will be at increased risk of stress‐related health problems themselves. Appropriate support of such carers is crucial if carer breakdown and consequent care‐receiver admission to residential homes is to be avoided. This paper examines the experience of older carers of frail older people with dementia and examines the kind of support that is provided to such carers. In practice, the sole source of professional support received by older people in this study was from community psychiatric nurses (CPNs). CPNs' role did not comprise hands‐on care‐giving and family carers carried out most personal/physical and healthcare tasks themselves, aided in some cases by care workers. The paper concludes by suggesting that lack of support for carers in these activities requires redress.